Feelings , emotions and attraction toward opposite sex is a natural
phenomenon and now days dating in schools is common. It resulted in a
new sort of violence which may be called school dating violence. It is
very much like the adult domestic violence. it can be physical abuse
leading to injury or even death in some cases ,but in a school
relationship the most of the abuse is emotional and verbal. Abuses
includes threatening to leave her or finding someone else or he tells
the girl no one will love her ,he will not let anyone love her ,she is
lucky to have him ,he will tell everyone about sex. He also tries to
break down the girl emotionally and destroy her self esteem.
sexual abuse also forms the part of school dating violence. This
include everything starting from unwillingly kissing or touching ,
forcing himself on her ,leading to sex and not letting a girl use
protection.
With the generation gap parents are unable to imagine only that their
daughter can face such violence with school friend. most of the
parents or adults are not even aware about this issue. Its the
responsibility of parents to see the warning signs which can be any
one or all of the signs listed below
1) Boy becoming everything for the girl.
2) girl dropping out of school activities.
3) Their grades may suffer.
4) Girl spending more time in her bedroom.
5) Girl showing signs of depression or aggressive behaviour
An abusive boyfriend also isolates her from her family and friend to
make her feel insecure and make her feel that he is the only person
she needs all the time for everything. He make her feel that he is the
only person who understand her and care about her.
Most of the girls couldn't even identify a abusive relationship. Its
not easy for a girl to leave such a abusive relationship even though
unlike adult domestic violence they don't have children and not
financially dependent on their partners. Still she will be reluctant
to leave the relationship because of shame ,embarrassment by friends
about her relationship.
The solution to this is prevention and awareness about the dating
violence . Special counsellors should be there in school for making
young teen girls aware about the violence and make them not to accept
it on face. Education on the sex and relationships should be imparted
to make them aware of the condition they might land in future. parents
should keep watch on their children and should counsel them on this
subject if they see any signs on their children. Mother plays
important part as she is the one with whom daughter can share her
life. one thing which parents should keep in mind that this age is of
adolescence and their children may argue with them or not listen to
them . Keep in mind when your growing children say they don't need
your advice ,its the time when they are in maximum of the need.
parents should keep their calm and handle things in a cool way. This
way School dating violence can be reduced to minimum or some day to
zero.
Don't let our young sisters and friend suffer from the hands of a demon.
Contribution by : Adhoora Khwaab
During my brief career as a realtor in the early 1990's I didn't make much money but I did meet a very interesting woman who was looking for a home. She counseled single mothers and pregnant teenagers in the area. She told me that a very high percentage of teenage pregnancies have nothing to do with mistakes, failed contraceptives, or the desire to have a baby. Apparently it's the safest way for many young women to break up with their boyfriends.
ReplyDeleteWhen a young woman tries to break up with an abusive, controlling male, he perceives it as a threat to his sense of masculinity and his reputation with his peers. His peers will assume that he wasn't man enough to take care of her needs and that will result in a loss of rank or status. If the girl gets pregnant, the male can now break up with her without any threat to his sense of manliness. He can tell his peers that the stupid bitch got herself pregnant and after all, he can't be tied down to a stupid pregger. He emerges with his manly pride intact. His family isn't burdened by the cost of child care. His dopey peers will still perceive him as an awesome stud. And the welfare system and the taxpayers (yeah, that's you) are burdened by another single mother and another baby that no one really wants to properly care for.
Remember this story the next time you attend a high school football game.